PotreroHillParents.org

(via KidsHealth.org)

Any kid worth his or her salt will generate a little chaos and disorganization. Yours might tear through the house leaving a trail of toys, backpacks, shoes, and empty drink cups. Or flit from one thing to the next - forgetting books at school, leaving towels on the floor, and failing to finish projects once started. You’d like your child to be more organized and to stay focused on tasks, such as homework. Is it possible?

Yes, it is. A few kids seem naturally organized, but for the rest of them, organization is a skill learned over time. Does your child seem especially resistant to living in an orderly way? With your help and some practice, your child can develop an effective approach to getting stuff done. And you are the perfect person to teach your child, even if you don’t feel all that organized yourself!

Easy as 1-2-3
For kids, all tasks can be broken down into a 1-2-3 process.

1. Getting organized means a kid gets where he or she needs to be and gathers the supplies needed to complete the task.
2. Staying focused means sticking with the task and learning to say “no” to distractions.
3. Getting it done means finishing up, checking your work, and putting on the finishing touches, like remembering to put a homework paper in the right folder and putting the folder inside the backpack so it’s ready for the next day.

Once your child knows these steps - and learns how to apply them - he or she can start tackling tasks more independently. That means homework, chores, and other tasks will get done with increasing consistency and efficiency. Of course, he or she will still need your help and guidance, but you probably won’t have to nag as much.

Not only is it practical to teach these skills, but knowing how to get stuff done will help your child feel more competent and effective. Kids feel self- confident and proud when they’re able to accomplish their tasks and responsibilities. They’re also sure to be pleased when they find they have some extra free time to do what they’d like to do.

From Teeth Brushing to Book Reports
To get started, introduce your child to the 1-2-3 method and help him or her practice it in daily life. Even something as simple as brushing teeth requires this approach, so you might use this example when introducing the concept to your child:

Getting organized: Go to the bathroom and get out your toothbrush and toothpaste. Turn on the water.

Staying focused: Dentists say to brush for 3 minutes, so that means keep brushing, even if you hear a really good song on the radio or you remember that you wanted to call your friend. Concentrate and remember what the dentist told you about brushing away from your gums.

Getting it done: If you do steps 1 and 2, step 3 almost takes care of itself. Hurray, your 3 minutes are up and your teeth are clean! Getting it done means finishing up and putting on the finishing touches. With teeth brushing, that would be stuff like turning off the water, putting away the toothbrush and paste, and making sure there’s no toothpaste foam on your face!

With a more complex task, like completing a book report, the steps would become more involved, but the basic elements remain the same. Here’s how you might walk your child through the steps:

Getting organized: Explain to your child that this step is all about getting ready. It’s about figuring out what you need to do and gathering the things you’ll need to do it. Ask your child, “So you have a book report to write. What are some of the things you need to do to get started?” Help your child make a list of things like: Choose a book. Make sure the book is OK with the teacher. Write down the book and the author’s name. Check the book out of the library. Mark the due date on a calendar.

Then help your child think of the supplies needed: The book, some note cards, a pen for taking notes, the teacher’s list of questions to answer, and a report cover. Encourage your child to gather the supplies where the work will take place.

As the project progresses, show your child how to use the list to check off what’s already done and get ready to do what’s next. Show your child how to add to the list as he or she goes, too. Coach your child to think, “OK, I did these things. Now, what’s next? Oh yeah, start reading the book.” Coach your child to ask, “What else do I need to do?” and to add things to the list like: Finish the book, read over my teacher’s directions, start writing the report.

Staying focused: Explain to your child that this part is about doing it, and sticking with the job. Tell your child this means doing what you’re supposed to do, following what’s on your list, and reminding yourself to keep doing it. It might mean sticking to the reading plan so your child doesn’t run out of time.

It also means sticking to it even when there’s something else your child would rather be doing - the hardest part of all! Help your child handle these inevitable temptations by explaining what he or she can do in those situations. While working on the report, a competing idea might pop into your child’s head, such as “I feel like shooting some hoops now.” Teach your child to challenge that impulse by asking himself or herself, “Is that what I’m supposed to be doing?”